As an empath it’s easy to get into someone’s energy field. Mostly we do it subconsciously – we are just eager to connect. It’s got its positive sides, but also its negative sides. In the beginning you just do it automatically, it’s your nature. But I believe it’s important to know as well why you do such a thing, since we also tend to do it for reasons that aren’t beneficial to us.

So you could ask yourself questions like: are we just being empathic, caring about other people, because we feel like it? Or might we overuse it sometimes because of our own trauma’s? Thus, let’s have a closer look at the latter, and let me bring up a case with a girl, whose energy I was absorbing too much, while being intimate. And yes, totally at the expense of myself.

Staying in Someone’s Energy Field

You remember this thing I mentioned before: astral projection? Connecting with other people’s energy field and staying there, can be a bit like projecting ourselves. We get out of our body – energetically – and stay in this field that feels comfortable. And why does it feel comfortable? Because their energy feels great? Do we want to bypass energy? Or do we find it a relief to leave our body for a while? Well, it could be any of these reasons. Or maybe a combination. But if it’s like hiding in their field, or just fleeing your own body because you don’t feel fully comfortable in it, then there is something to become aware of – to heal.

Own Trauma’s

I do have to say that it doesn’t need to be bad to stay in someone’s energy field for a while. In fact, people often like it. Especially when you bring in your light and love – and the more sensitive ones are good at bringing in light and love. It’s just that we can have our own trauma’s, which can sometimes make us want to flee (from being in) our own bodies – also because we can. Avoiding the necessity of feeling our own feelings, and our own needs – which might seem odd, but it’s often the case. So we have to be aware of our true intentions. Do we connect, because we want to connect? Or do we have a hard time in our own bodies? I do have to say, there are also empaths that are simply too sensitive: they might want to avoid people or crowded places above all, because they absorb too much of their energy.

Absorbing Energy

Speaking of which: I know what it’s like to absorb too much energy of someone. Therefore I should take you back to a New Year’s Eve party in Amsterdam, where I met this girl. We had a certain connection, and after some jokes and chit chat, we started kissing. She left the party with her friends – quite soon – but we got in touch again through social media. It was fun chatting online, and I decided to visit her in Amsterdam (I was still living in Madrid, Spain). Maybe there was a true connection, right?

We felt good enough to meet at her apartment, where I would stay over the weekend. We talked, had a drink, and fortunately we still felt this connection. Upfront we had talked about this good Thai restaurant that she knew, but because things were so cozy, we decided to eat something at her place. And there… it went wrong. After some kissing, having a pizza for dinner, and some love making, we fell asleep. But during the night my stomach started to feel really bad; the cramps were knocking me out. In the morning I couldn’t bear the idea of any breakfast; I just needed loads of hot tea.

Her body

Now it could have been a coincidence, or the pizza. But there is something I have to tell you about our love making – without getting into too many details. While I was caressing her body I noticed someting odd; physically. Something that would have been too awkward to share at that stage (and with you, by the way). So I just left it. But after a tiring second day – on which I did make it to the cinemas with her -, being emotionally overwhelmed in the airplane by some deep sadness (I was crying with my sunglasses on, on my way home), and miraculously feeling better right after the flight (to go straight to a company class), I realised something else must have been going on: I must have absorbed too much of her ‘bad’ energy. Something painful to her, I guess, which possibly had left a physical mark on her body… Never found out what it actually was. But I guess being an empath can be a pain sometimes.